A Message To Yung Berg

Dear Yung Berg,

First, I would like to say that you spell your name wrong. I'm all for creative freedom, but it just makes you look stupid. Now, getting to the reason I'm writing this letter, Don't you think it's time to hire a bodyguard? You have been beaten and robbed more times than you've put out music. Doesn't that alarm you in any way? If it doesn't, you're dumber than I thought. Part of the reason you keep getting robbed and beat down is because you are the epitome of black people having money and not knowing what to do with it. A Megatron diamond chain?! Really, homie, have you not heard about investments and 401ks? Personally, I wouldn't steal from you because I know that the 'Sexy Can I' money isn't that long. Presently, I can't think of any other hits you may have had, so I presume you're probably just as broke as most of us are. It seems you do have some fans, why or how I don't know, but you do. For the three of them, keep doing what you're doing. As for the rest of the intelligent music listeners in the world, stop rapping. Then after that you should, think about another career plan, far from show business. Once that is complete, invest in a home security system because even if you can't afford a bodyguard, Brinks got you.

Thanks,
The World